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A person enters a shop and shouts where
is my free gift?
Shopkeeper: There is no gift with this oil.
Person: Oye! Here it says CHOLESTORL FREE!!
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Joke: Dermatologist: Good News! test
results reports that you will no longer be plagued by pimples
Girl: Great! How come?
Dr: There is no more space left.
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Ques: How do you know that carrots are
good for your eyesight?
Ans: Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses!
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Dr: I have a good news and a bad news
Patient: Good news first
Dr: You have 24 hrs to live
Patient: What is the bad news?
Dr: It is yesterdays news
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A baby was born to a Sardar.
When the nurse brought the baby to him beamed out saying, Please dont
tell my wife about this, I want to give her a surprise!
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Teacher: How old is your father.
Student: As old as I am
Teacher: How is it possible?
Student: He became father only after I was born
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Judge: How do you plead? Guilty or not
guilty?
Prisoner: How do I know, your honor? I have not heard the evidence yed
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Dr: Shall I gave your wife a local
anaesthetic?
Businessman: Certainly not. I can afford something imported
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One man to another: I want to marry a
smart woman, a good woman and a woman who will make me happy
The 2nd man replied: Make up your mind
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A couple were arguing.
Wife: You dont like anybody in my family
Man: Not true, I like your mother-in-law better than my mother-in-law!
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Ques: How do you get your wife to listen
and pay undivided attention to every word you say?
Ans: Start talking in your sleep
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A Sardar(who just learned English) went
to a party and introduced his family...
Hi, I am Sardar and this is Sardarnee, this is my kid and that is my
kidney!
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Can I go to the theater? asks a kid
mosquito to its mother
Mother: Yes but be aware and pay special attention during the applause!
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Sardar:Excuse me, what time is it
MAN:3:15
Sardar:Thats so weird, I have been asking this all day, and each time I
get a different answer
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Banta Singhs Mother:Why are you doing bad
in history?
Banta Singh:Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened
before I was born!
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Sardar 2 friend:Guess how many coins I
have in my pocket?
Friend:If I guess right, you give me 1?
Sardar:Oji,I will give both of them!
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Sardar wants to make STD call to Punjab,
guess what he does to reduce the cost?
He goes to Punjab and makes a local call!!
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What are the three fastest ways of
communication in todays fast moving world?
a) Telephone b) Television c) Tell-a-woman!
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Why was Bunta Singh happy when he
finished a puzzle in two months time.....?
Because the box said:3 till 5 years.
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Ques: What is the most effective way to
remember your wifes birthday??
Ans: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again!
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Sardarji to others:Did anyone lose money
wrapped in a rubber band
One said,Yes I did!
Banta Singh:Well, its your lucky day, I found the rubberband!
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Banta:My computer is going crazy
Santa:Why, Whats wrong
Banta:I dont have a keyboard but it still gives a keyboard error!
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A Sardar Jee bought an A.M. radio and it
took him a month to find out by accident that he could listen to it at
night also.
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Sardarji:There are lot of girls who dont
want to get married!
Friend:How do you know?
Sardarji:I asked them!
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Father to Guy:Would you still love my
daughter even if she was poor?
Guy:Of course!
Father to Girl:He is no good, we do not want fools in our family
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Manager:From your references I see you
have had four jobs in the last month.
Applicant:Yes Sir, but doesnt that shows how much in demand I am?
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Mother:I sent my little boy for 1Kg of
fruits and you only sent 800 grams.
Grocer: My scales are all right, madam but have you weighed your little
boy?
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Did i do anything wrong?Then why r u
avoiding me?At least remember me once in a week,its hurting me
really..With luv..urs..OnLy Urs"BATHSOAP"
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Every morning i need u ...My lips die to
touch u ...i want u in my bed I want u to be hot I LOVE YOU...My dearest
"LIPTON TEA".....
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